Dr. Wylie’s Revenge
My Midlife Gamer Crisis
By David Wylie - June 16th, 2008
Image courtesy of mobygames.com
At some point in a video gamer’s life, he will struggle with a deep philosophical question: “What kind of gamer am I?”
Xbox Live made me ponder this question not long ago by making me choose a “Gamer Zone.” The four options are family, recreation, pro and underground. At first I had chosen recreation, but a midlife gamer crisis eventually made me rethink that decision. I’m now in the pro zone. However, here I am – yet again – having an identity crisis.
So I raise the question to you: what kind of gamer are you?
The puzzler: You love games, such as Hexic and Collapse – games where you can just zone out and let your mind solve the simple puzzles offered by these games.
The achievement hog: You have no shame admitting you rented Avatar so you could score the 1,000 achievements in one hour to add to your already sickening gamerscore. You go out of your way to do boring, repetitive tasks for the achievement.
The trash talker: You live to go online and tell all of your opponents how crappy they are and how great you are. You teabag those you killed and hang out in the post-game lobby to gloat.
The casual gamer: It’s all about having fun, right? You spend a few hours a week playing whatever you feel like playing.
The hardcore gamer: There’s one game that you really love, and you play this game a couple hours a day until you are the King of Kong. It’s not worth playing if you’re not number 1.
The team killer: You kill and annoy your teammates online. Other gamers hope you get the Red Ring of Death.
The Wii one: You never owned a video game system until Nintendo came out with the Wii. You own Wii Fit and Wii Sports. It’s likely you live in a nursing home.
The rock star: You get together with your Rock Band band mates once a week to jam. You can beat “Through the Fire and Flames” on expert.
The straight shooter: Call of Duty, Halo, Ghost Recon; these are your friends.
The social gamer: You don’t mind spending 30 minutes playing and an hour catching up with friends in the pre- and post-game lobbies. You’ll spend the whole game asking your pals how their kids are doing.
The retro gamer: You’ve got a bona fide Pac-Man arcade game in your basement. You own a NES, Atari and Sega Genesis. Every time the online stores come out with a new retro game, you buy it.
I think I have a little bit of each one of these in me, except team killer (so don’t wish the RRoD on me!). Maybe that makes me a jack of all trades gamer. But if I had to pick one or two categories I gravitate to, they would probably be achievement hog and straight shooter.
Have I missed any? Leave a comment and tell me what kind of gamer you are.
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2 responses so far:Like you, I’m a combination of several types of gamers. Hell, even a little Team Killing is justifiable if you were killed first.
The thing I like best about video games, though, is their social aspect. In fact, I probably spend just as much time talking with friends about gaming as I do actually playing them.
But I’m still too afraid to change my Gamer Zone from “Recreational.”